Don’t be silly.
You are a girl, silly!
Remember the way the world works.
“Don’t touch me you lesbian!!!”
Someone said that to me once.
Eugh, I’m not a lesbian, that’s gross.
I would never be-
Year 9: Sex Education
Penis in vagina sex.
Oh. That’s all there is?
Watched porn with only girls.
Does this mean I’m…
Everyone watches porn with only girls!!!
I’m just normal.
My first proper boyfriend.
I decided I was ready. Ready for intercourse being the most important thing. After all, we all know that it is the most important. He didn’t have any condoms. An old mate sped down to the local servo on his skateboard to get some.
He didn’t pinch the tip. The tip? You know, of the condom? To let all of the air out to ensure the condom suctions onto the penis in question? Even I knew that. I think he actually just threw the condom at his penis and hoped for the best.
Don’t think either of us knew lube existed.
Painful. It’s meant to be painful? Come on, everyone tells you it’s going to be painful!!! Don’t worry it’s totally normal!!!
Most of the time I just stared at the ceiling. Would have been nice if there was a pretty picture on the roof. Like what you might find at your local dentist.
On a beach. I kissed her. Then I ran away. In shock.
Did I really?
We can’t though.
“Oh my GOD I ALWAYS knew you were gay!!!
“I think it was the way you did your HAIR”
“I just had a FEELING about it!!!”
“Must have been my GAYDAR!”
“You’re not in love with ME are you?”
I never said I was-
“What’s it LIKE being with a girl?”
“What do you DO?”
“I WISH I was gay! It would make everything so much easier!”
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE TO YOU THE NEW AND IMPROVED RELATIONSHIP:
DATING SOMEONE OF THE SAME SEX AS YOU.
ERASES ALL HUMAN CHARACTERISTICS SO YOUR RELATIONSHIP CAN RUN SMOOTHLY AND WITHOUT ANY COMPLICATIONS.
That’s not actually how it-
!!! WITHOUT !!! ANY !!! COMPLICATIONS !!!
“Break up with your girlfriend. I can cure you with my ****.”
“You’re not seriously in a relationship are you? Like, it’s just a Facebook joke right?”
“Oh did you break up? Well, let me know when you’re ready for a real relationship.”
“Oh so you’re with a MAN now? That must be NICE. Nice to have something a bit more NORMAL? How long have you been together? It’s pretty SERIOUS isn’t it? When are we going to meet HIM?”
What the f-
EXCUSE ME HI THERE NOW THAT YOU’RE DATING A MAN, I’M AFRAID I’LL HAVE TO TAKE YOUR BI BADGE AWAY. DOESN’T LOOK LIKE YOU’LL BE NEEDING IT.
“Bisexual? That’s just a phase though isn’t it? Like, it’s not forever?”
“Come ON. Aren’t you done with that queer crap?”
“Pansexual? SO you love PANS now?!”
Back in high school.
Queer was wrong then.
Queer IS wrong.
I don’t like this.
This frame that you put me in.
I’m not what you want me to be.
I’m not defined by you.
Or the condoms and oral dams next to my bed.
I don’t change because you want me to.
I change because I want me to.
I can carry my queer self now.
Without their words.
Don’t be silly.